Road Weary
Recently I began to travel a lot for work. I spend hours in my car every week and, to be honest, it can be a bit of a drag. By nature I am someone who doesn’t mind driving long distances but even I get a little worn out from it.
For the first few weeks I would begin the week with a pit in my stomach trying to get myself psyched up to hit the road once again.
To exacerbate the issue, when people heard about my new schedule they would, without fail, say something to the effect of “Oh my gosh! How do you do it?! I feel so bad for you!” If I wasn’t so bothered until that point, hearing it so many times had a negative effect on my psyche!
On one of my trips I began to look at things in a logical, as opposed to emotional, manner. I asked myself, “What in fact bothers me about driving this much?” To be sure, when the weather is bad it is an easy answer, it can be very stressful to drive in inclement conditions. But when the weather is fine, what is the big deal?
After giving it some thought I realized that the thing that bothered me the most was the amount of time it took. Still, was that the entire issue? Drilling deeper I thought to myself, “What is the big deal about spending so much time in the car? After all, the clock moves at the exact same speed regardless what setting I am in.” In other words, a 7-hour drive contains the same 7 hours whether I am in the car, at home or in the office. If the time elapsed is the same regardless of the setting I had to crystallize for myself what exactly bothers me about driving?
Finally I arrived at the root of the issue. I realized that so much time is passing from my life and I am unable to utilize that time in the same manner as I would do if I were not constricted to the confines of a car. Bingo! That was it!
Being able to focus like a laser and pinpoint exactly what my issue was, I was then able to work on a resolution. I realized that if I can utilize the time I spend in the car I can take a negative and turn it into a positive!
I began to listen to numerous Torah lectures on the phone (there are a number of resources that provide literally thousands of Torah lectures on a multitude of topics). I unwind by listening to the radio. I catch up with people on the phone who I am often too busy to talk to but who appreciate having a conversation with me and I with them. I admire the amazing panorama, marvel at the incredible beauty of G-d’s world. And most of all, I have time to myself to indulge in a rare activity – THINKING!
The great Jewish philosophical work – the Path of the Just – (if you were at the JFX shabbaton you heard Saul Blinkoff wax eloquently about this great work), states that the greatest weapon that the Evil Inclination has in preventing spiritual growth is to keep people so busy that they have no time to think. If we don’t use our greatest asset – our intellect – to focus on our spiritual state and where we can improve, then we remain stagnant. As a result the Evil Inclination keeps all of us so busy, even doing many good things, all so that we don’t have time to think.
Having come to this realization, I became aware of several lessons.
First, oftentimes we are bothered but we don’t spend the time to crystallize the real cause of what is bothering us. Instead we go through the motions of being aggravated but do nothing to try and rectify or cope with the situation. If we can drill down and clarify what is the crux of the issue we can often come up with some coping methods. This I believe is a great technique that I hope to apply to all walks of my life.
Second, I have a newfound appreciation for the great gift of time. Nothing is more valuable and at the same time nothing is squandered more by people. Realizing that I was bothered by the lack of productivity made me realize how valuable time is.
Finally, I have found better ways to utilize my time so that the time spent in my car has now transformed to very productive time. My car trips are now not something I dread but something which, in a sense, I actually anticipate.
So the next time life gives you lemons, try and turn those lemons into a lemon daiquiri (unless of course you are driving like me, in which case you should turn them into lemonade).
And if you need to know the cheapest places to fill up with gas on I-80 feel free to give me a call!
Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Yosef Koval
