One Candle

One Candle Friday night. The house is clean, peaceful, and quiet. The food warms in the oven, filling the house with fragrant anticipation. The children all wait patiently for me to light candles so they can shower me with hugs and kisses…. Okay, okay, okay. Reality check. Sometimes, SOME of those things are going on at our home on Friday night, and other times, not as much. But Friday night is always special. And no matter what, I light those candles and, after, whisper prayers for myself, my family, and my community. About half a year ago, I got a WhatsApp message from a woman I know loosely from Facebook, Chumie Jacobson. She wrote: Hi Ruchi. Thank you for your beautiful articulation during this impossible time. I was wondering if I could quote you in the Ner Echad newsletter. If you're not yet a member of ner Echad (check it out and join, it's beautiful!) I'll explain a bit here. It's a worldwide women's unity organization that I help run. Women connect through the weekly randomized prayer share system, and give an automated joint token to charity every Friday at sunset. I write a weekly newsletter and I've been grappling with how to address current events. We have the full spectrum of members. Geographically, age range, and the full gamut of kinds of Jews and levels of Orthodoxy. Your post uniquely addressed us all and I'd love to use it with your permission? I agreed, and, intrigued, asked to learn more about the organization. “Ner Echad” is Hebrew for “one candle,” and the concept is that we are all united through our candles each Friday night. Chumie sent me a YouTube link to learn more. I was so touched by the concept, I signed up on the spot. Since then, every Friday, I get an email and a text letting me know what time candle-lighting is in my area, with a randomized name of someone to pray for. For example: Dear Ruchi Koval, Candle lighting time in Cleveland, OH is 5:03 PM. Joining with thousands of women around the world in candle-lighting, prayer, and $1 charity, please utilize that special time to pray for Miriam Rochel bas Frumet Sara from Far Rockaway, NY for Refuah Shleima/Complete recovery from illness. Have a wonderful Shabbos! Before Shabbat, I write down the name and reason on a post-it note, and place it near my candles. My children see that I am praying for a stranger just as I pray for my nearest and dearest. At the same time, a Jewish woman somewhere on Planet Earth is getting my name, and praying for me as she lights her candles. One dollar is charged to my credit card for tzedaka each Friday. It is one of the most beautiful sisterhoods I’ve been part of. This past Friday morning, I got the following email: Dear Ruchi Koval, This is to notify you that the attempt by Ner Echad to charge your credit card account for $1.00 on January 15, 2021 was rejected. The attempted charge to your account was for the weekly renewal of your account. Please try to make the payment again. If you help to resolve this issue please contact the Ner Echad office at 844-637-3242 or info@nerechad.org. I thought this was weird. There was nothing wrong with my credit card (this time). But, I’m one of those who likes to clear these things up ASAP, plus I didn’t want there to be any disruption in my weekly tzedaka donation, so I emailed them back right away: Thank you, Is there a secure link where I can update my credit card information? Less than an hour later, the following email appeared: Dear Valued Ner Echad Member, It appears that this morning, Jan 15, we experienced a system-wide glitch, and the weekly one dollar donations to charity were unable to be charged. We are working as quickly as we can to address the issue and thank you so much for your patience while we sort this out. We are of course frustrated that this happened, but we are also heartened by the outpour of love from our members, who all want nothing more than to pray for one another. Hundreds of you called, texted and emailed asking how you can fix it - wanting only to be able to give that dollar together, and to pray for your Ner Echad sisters. How beautiful! What a holy group of women!! It is possible, even likely, that as a result of this, you may not receive a name to pray for this afternoon. If that is the case, you can do what others have done in cases where they did not get their weekly name - ask Hashem to bring close every Jewish woman, and we can all keep each other in our hearts as we welcome Shabbos. G-d willing, we will update you all early next week as this is resolved. Thank you all for your unwavering support of and dedication to Ner Echad, and may we always merit to light united. Thank you for lighting up the world! What can I say? My eyes filled with tears reading this email. How lucky I am, how blessed we are, how very special a merit it is to be Jewish, and to have such concepts be knit into the very fabric of our being! Charity, mutual responsibility, prayer, filling the world with light and peace via our actions in our own private homes -- do we even realize how radical these themes are and how powerful a force Judaism has been, and what a pivotal role it has played in bringing these ideas to the world? In that moment I felt completely overwhelmed by my good fortune. To be Jewish. To be a Jewish woman. To be a child of God. To have Shabbat. To have all of you. Shabbat Shalom -- we are all part of one candle Shabbat Shalom, Ruchi