Baby Steps
Recently my one-year old daughter took her first steps.
This milestone in a child’s life always leaves me in awe of the greatness of the Creator. I find it fascinating how a child goes from a completely immobile being, to crawling and then walking, all the while figuring out how to do this on his own. Who gives a child the know-how to progress on their own if not G-d?
My other children were all crowded around her and each time she stood up and took a step there were wild cheers. She smiled from ear to ear and promptly fell down. She got up and took another step, was cheered loudly, then fell down again. This pattern kept repeating itself.
As she became comfortable taking one step, I or one of the kids would hold out our hands to her just beyond her reach, forcing her to take a step towards them. Sometimes she succeeded and other times she fell.
Watching what was going on I realized that this is a perfect analogy in many ways to our relationship with G-d.
We are put in this world with the mission to become better people and to constantly grow in our spirituality and our relationship to G-d. This mission takes work and effort; nothing comes easy.
Sometimes we take a little baby step forward and G-d and all of the angels who are watching, hoping that we will fulfill our mission on this earth, cheer wildly for us.
Other times we fall and don’t make the progress that we should. Like a baby, such a setback should be no more than a brief one. Babies don't stop trying to walk after falling the first time. They get right back up, completely unfazed by the fall and try again.
We too need to get right back up and continue to try and grow so that eventually the one step turns into two, then three. We must also recognize how G-d is coaxing us to continue to grow.
Imagine how frustrating it must be for a baby that every time she nears her goal (her parents’ outstretched arms) the parent moves back a little more. “Why are my parents so cruel?” she must be thinking (if she knew how to talk, that is). What she does not understand is that her parents move back so that her goal can expand. Rather than remaining at the one-step level, she is encouraged and prodded to move to the two-step level and further.
Often we receive challenges from G-d and when we near the end of the ordeal we are confronted with yet another challenge. We may question, why won't G-d just give us a break? The answer is because G-d is simply prodding us to continue to grow and move to even greater heights in our connection to him.
Another thought. When a one-year-old takes a step everyone cheers for her, including her own clapping and feeling proud of herself. Imagine if my ten-year-old asked why we don’t clap for her when she walks. After all, she can even take many more steps than the baby! She can even run and jump! The obvious answer is because walking is no longer an achievement for the ten-year-old - it is expected of her. The one-year-old on the other hand is still new at this so even a small step is an achievement worth applauding.
In our lives as well, we have a tendency to look at others and think “I may have my shortcomings but compared to THAT GUY I am a saint!” We fill ourselves with a sense of pride and accomplishment merely by virtue of comparing ourselves to the next person. Like the ten-year-old comparing herself to the one-year-old, this is a silly outlook. What is a significant accomplishment for one person is what’s expected from another. We need only look inwards to determine what our goals need to be and to get an assessment of where we stand.
Lastly, just as a baby cannot go from crawling to running in one shot, so too we should not expect to make huge jumps in our own growth in one shot. Growth is achieved over an entire lifetime. Our job is to constantly take baby steps and over the long course we will make significant progress.
Shabbat shalom!
Rabbi Yosef Koval
